Zero Mind

Argh.... how I wish to have a zero mind tonight!

What is zero mind, anyway? Err... I don't know for sure but I thought it was about having a clear mind to think, to differ right from wrong, to free yourself from regret and other stuffs that drain your energy and makes you tired of nothing. I don't know. It's just...

Few days ago, my teacher asked how I was doing. And about my family condition of course. Somehow, knowing that he's not "on my side" for my decision to split upset me. Like, he's defending that person, who has abandoned his family and not even bother to touch the phone and ask how we were doing. Not even a single attention was given. But then, why did my teacher even said that kind of thing. But then, well.... Maybe he had a good reason of saying so.

Okay, about being "zero" again. One thing for sure to be zero right now is my account's balance. T_T I wonder what actually occupies my mind, when it's the final 10 days of Ramadhan, I should focus my energy on capturing Lailatul Qadr! That's all!!! Forget about being melancholy, or about buying things I don't really need immediately, or about food I want to eat but currently not available... You'll be full just by eating anything halal offered on your table. No need special kind of dish, no need to bother what others might say about you now. Well, most people don't know the truth behind your staying at your parents' house. They might guess this or that, but as long as you keep silent, all is fine, I guess, haha....

So, instead of expecting zero mind, which you don't know exactly how, just keep going. Do what you have to do, don't do what you don't have to ^_^